5 BOLD NFL Predictions!

        I know I Know we have been slacking.  But he we are again.  And I bet you want to know why I'm waiting till after the first week to make predictions.  Well, I pity the fool who thinks you can learn anything in the NFL preseason.  So after seeing what needed to be seen in week 1 I give you things which are sure to happen.  How do I know?  Well Marty McFly didn’t leave a sports almanac in my car, so I shook a magic 8-ball until it told me these things were true.

Antonio Cromartie Will Have an Interception Every Game.  

You are probably thinking to yourself: “he had more penalties in the first game than children he can’t name.”  My response: “you don’t get mad at McDonalds for setting up franchises.”  Seriously though, with Revis playing on the opposite side of the field wouldn’t you throw against Cromartie?  Most elite corners don’t get picks because quarterbacks don’t throw against them.  Well Cromartie went to a pro bowl in 2007 and has a lot of talent.  And he won’t get as many penalties as the season goes on, because he won’t be playing Anquan Boldin each week.

Pittsburgh Will Win 10+ games When Big Ben Returns.  

Sure he likes having his way with girls in the bathroom of a club, but hey deviants have had a place in the NFL before.  Killers like Ray Lewis, Dante Stallworth, and Leonard Little have performed well after their deeds (OJ did it after he was done playing).  There also is a precedent for Ben to perform above expectations.  He did win 14 games in a row as a rookie, and has had a perfect passer rating an astounding three times!  To put that in perspective the only other people to do that are Kurt Warner, with three, and Peyton Manning who had 4.  So much to the chagrin of quite a few people I think Roethlisberger will prevail if he doesn’t force the situation…. On the field I mean.

The Colts Will Not Make the Playoffs.  

This seems ludicrous I know, but come on, they cannot be great forever.  The biggest reason for this is that Bob Sanders is injured and may miss the entire season.  Bob Sanders is the best defensive player in the NFL.  Don’t believe me?  Look at what happens to the defense when he doesn’t play.  Then look at what happens when he does.  Arian Foster rushing for 231 yards while Big Bob is patrolling the field… NOT A CHANCE!  Sanders went out after the first series and Foster went off.  And after the loss to the Texans it’s hard not to think Houston of Tennessee will break through this year.  Without winning the division it is going to be near impossible for any team in the AFC to get a wild card for the playoffs, and there just seems to be a perfect storm for the blue and white to be at home for the postseason.

Drew Brees Will Win the NFL MVP. 

How is this bold?  Most people wouldn’t think this is too much of a stretch, since he has enough good pass catchers on his team to start a new arena league.  But people forget he was on the cover of Madden this year, and the Madden curse has yet to fail.  What about Brett Favre he didn’t miss any games?  Yeah but he tore his bicep and threw a million interception to end the season—yes a million I watched film and counted.  What does Brees have that the other Madden covergirls don't? Well he is the only pocket passer not receiving social security, and also the only one to appear as a guest on the season finale of Entourage.  Those two things lead me to believe he will not be injured, he will throw for over 5000 yards again, and the decline of Peyton Manning will leave the MVP primed for Brees’ picking.

The Redskins Will Win the NFC East.  

If you expected me to go through an entire football conversation without saying anything blindly favoring my team you better get familiar.  There is a new sheriff in town, a new man pulling the trigger, and an above average defense.  John Elway was older than McNabb when Shanny first got to Denver, and McNabb never had a real run game in that trashy—literally trash everywhere—city of Philly.  In addition to the improvements made, the rest of the division seems to be a little down this year.  Skins went 0-6 in those games, already have a leg up on the Cowgirls, Philly will not win with Kolb and don’t want to commit to Vick, and the Giants seem to keep getting worse since their Super Bowl Win.  So Hail to the Redskins, ‘cause they’re bringing the division crown back where it needs to be!

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--Grey Area