Kal-El... You Disappoint Me! (Spoilers Encased... but if you haven't already after 4 years don't even bother just read)

ENCODED MESSAGE // FROM: AGENT ORANGE

  

SUPERMAN RETURNS

Director: Brian Singer

Major Players: Kevin Spacey, Kate Bosworth, and Kevin Routh

Im only writting this to stop the crazy long break that LNGchz has been having lately and I apologize to the fans... I'm also writing this because as we speak Grey Matter is watching the worst superhero film since Catwoman... Let's take a trip down memory lane and this has been a long time coming... and someone needed to say it... SUPERMAN RETURNS BLOWS... Did (Director) Brian Singer see Mallrats!? For god sakes Brodie said Superman can't bang regular chicks. The guy blows a load like a shotgun (thus killing them) and Wonder Woman is the only woman with a strong enough womb to carry his child and i believe him dammit!! So when I found out Lois Lane (played by Kate Bosworth) gave birth to Superman's child, I couldn't help but picture Bosworth as corpse drenched in Kryptonian semen throughout the rest of the movie!! And what the hell is up with him neglecting to fight anyone in the movie? I watch Superman to see him whip up on some alien ass (or at least get some) not save the everyday man from everyday life... that's what drugs and alcohol are for people... we don't need him running around saving people from natural disasters and burning buildings, the Earth is populated enough. I only got one word that could make the sequel 100 times better... DOOMSDAY!!! Comic fans know what I'm talking about and if you dont know look it up... Click DOOMSDAY! The best thing about this movie was Kevin Spacey's performance as Lex Luthor. He was the perfect choose in my opinion... as was new comer Brandon Routh as Superman... but anyone could play Superman with the limited amount of lines that Routh had... I would've settled for Tom Cruise as Superman because you would save money on stuntmen and CG effects because Tom Cruise does what Superman does on a daily basis all the while making multi-million dollar movie deals... but that's a story for another day!! What i'm trying too say is not to see this film if you like Superman because it'll distort your vision of the man of steel for years to come! Soooo looks like DC comics fans are going to have to settle with Batman because he seems to be the only superhero that can deliver box office gold. Batman 2 - Superman 0!


END//TRANSMISSION


--Agent Orange